Apologies and More Apologies...
I fully realize that a weekly Substack that hasn’t been updated at all in almost two months (and hasn’t been updated on a regular basis in four months or so, give or take) is, by anyone’s definition, a functionally dead Substack. So, I’m sorry.
I don’t want that to be the case, so I’ve been reflecting on the best way to get back on this particular horse. For a number of reasons, it’s just been a real challenge for me to stay invested in all kinds of stuff for this first chunk of 2026. I plan to speak to some of those reasons later on, but the most important has been stupid run-of-the-mill medical stuff. My wife has had an array of medical crises since December, and then my own beleaguered immune system decided to give up and I’ve spent much of the last month struggling with my own medical nonsense.
For a period of almost two weeks, I even lost my voice, which was not a pleasant experience for me--though it might have been a pleasant experience for my students, my clients, my wife, and others who are doubtless exhausted at hearing me rant about all kinds of topics long after they’ve grown bored of the entire situation.
Being (literally, even if temporarily) voiceless was not great. It would probably have made me reflect on the value of patience and the importance of rest a lot more if I wasn’t completely without the energy to reflect on much of anything.
So, yes, I’m feeling better now. Finally. Thanks for everyone who checked in on either or both of us, and know that you’re very much appreciated. My voice isn’t entirely back, but I can now at least be heard, which is (as previously noted) a mixed bag for all those around me.
The question isn’t “Why didn’t I unsubscribe from that dead newsletter?”, though. It’s “What can Matt do to make it worthwhile to read again for folks who have completely forgotten it existed?”
I’m no stranger to blogging. I’ve lost count of the number of blogs I’ve worked on diligently (if temporarily) across the past twenty years or so. And that means I’m also no stranger to writing posts like this one, where I say I’m sorry for getting busy or bored and abandoning my best intentions. I really enjoyed the blog I wrote with my wife for a bit--that one was titled for a song which still gives me goosebumps. I loved the site (and message board, and other assorted projects) that I ran which was dedicated to a band that has now pretty much dissolved. And I got a lot of joy from the book review blog I stuck with for the longest out of them all.
I haven’t stopped listening to those bands. I haven’t stopped reading those books. But I stopped writing, across all of those platforms, because time is precious and because sustaining my attention on one project for the long-term is not something I typically do. There have been exceptions, such as my marriage (almost 28 years and counting) or my love of video games (40 years or so) or my obsession with books (longer than that).
So it’s not impossible to consider the possibility of me sticking with this too. Coming back to the world of semi-regular posts, staying engaged with my (small) readership, providing a ‘product’ that offers you all some perceived value of sorts. All of that is a possibility. It’s even an alluring possibility, at that. I still hesitate to guarantee you that I’m done with my self-imposed hiatus, though. Because I know the truth about how exhausted I’ve been pretty much since 2026 began. I know how easy it is to check out from things that take sustained mental effort, especially in the midst of everything that’s happening in the world right now. I can promise you that I’ll try, and that’s what I’ve got in me.
How about this: let me start with an update. Here’s an abbreviated list of some of the things that have been on my mind since we last spoke.
The current immigration crackdown in this country is immoral, indefensible, and beyond evil. ICE does not need to exist. I know that my position on geopolitical borders isn’t shared by everyone, and I’m comfortable with that. Honestly? I would be happiest if we didn’t have guarded borders of any kind. It does not matter to me who enters this country or that country, because the concept of “countries” is a construct anyway. That said, if we are going to disagree with Matt and if our society really really cares about silly things like which side of an imaginary line you or I were born on, then our society is going to have some kind of immigration enforcement system. ICE is not a workable or humane part of such a system, and it needs to be shut down. If saying that puts me on some sort of a list, I’m pretty comfortable with that. They’re acting in ways that I see as unredeemable.
I know I’ve said this before, but I’ll mention it again just for fun: I’m not an advocate of violent revolution in this country or any other. Peaceful movements have been far more successful, in far more sustained ways, throughout the course of human history. We need to change the way our system functions (and has functioned for a long time). We do not need to do that by killing people or fomenting violent uprisings. I’m a Quaker, and Quakers have been instrumental in a whole lot of societal change for the better across several hundred years now. We need peace now more than ever.
This semester has been an unusual one. My program continues to get bigger and bigger, and the consistent message I keep getting from every single instructor in the program is that our students are so smart, so values-driven, and a real pleasure to teach. That’s been my experience as well. Our students are truly stellar, and working with them is such an honor. At the same time, it’s been hard for me to be as present for them as I usually am this semester. That’s not because I don’t care, it’s because I haven’t had the capacity. They have been very compassionate and understanding about that lack of capacity, and I cannot tell you how touched that has made me feel. It’s an all-around wonderful group of human beings, and also a dream job for me.
I’ve been focused on returning to a world where I am more in control of my own stuff, not letting huge corporations allow me to rent things from them. One example of this is my music collection. I’ve gone so far as to purchase an actual digital music player and fancy headphones, as well as going through multiple old laptops to dig up my 13,000 old songs that I haven’t listened to for at least a decade. Rather than streaming music, I can listen to my weird faves without a subscription whenever I feel like it. It’s caused me to purchase so much music, and has been really good for my mental health. I strongly encourage you to do the same.
I play Scrabble on my Ipad every single day, and have for several months now. There is a person named Bethany G. who seems to enjoy competing with me as much as I enjoy competing with her--we currently have around fifteen concurrent Scrabble games going. I don’t know why, but Bethany G. has also helped me a great deal with my mental health, without ever exchanging a word (beyond the thousands of words we’ve exchanged in-game). If you’re curious about how we’re each doing, I have currently won 35 times against her and she’s won 9 times against me. And yet she persists. Do you want to play Scrabble with me? Reach out! I’ve always got room for more Bethany Gs.
Kellie and I have been enjoying a whole host of HBO Max shows lately, both old and new. A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms and The Pitt are both delightful, we’re in the first season of a rewatch of The Wire, and Neighbors is simultaneously incredibly entertaining and also incredibly stressful. Thank goodness for good neighbors too, am I right?
Our dogs continue to be the very best dogs in the entire world. Ivy spends much of her time relaxing, and could teach us all a lot about the value of rest. Coco spends much of her time trying to destroy and/or eat everything in our home, and has taught me that she will somehow not die despite consuming both orange Gatorade and red velvet cake with buttercream frosting over the past 24 hours (no, I’m not kidding). Neither ingestion was a LOT, but both were still more than a little concerning to us.
I’m also reading a lot. I’ve finished four books so far in February. I’m halfway done with three others (one is a Young Adult novel about kids fighting against an authoritarian regime, one is about teaching and instilling a love for learning in the age of generative AI, and one is about practicing medicine in the future).
Video games? Absolutely. Pipestrello and the Cursed Yo Yo, Hollow Knight: Silksong, and Mewgenics have taken up most of my gaming time so far this year. All are masterpieces.
David Thomas, state representative to half of Ashtabula County, continues to propose and co-sponsor a whole host of ridiculous legislation. Just another reminder that if he succeeds in his obsressive quest to destroy the property tax structure of this state, we will all be very harmed by the resulting destruction of our state’s infrastructure. He’s making moves to harm libraries, schools, emergency services, local governments, people in poverty, LGBTQ+ people, and so many others. He doesn’t deserve to continue to remain in an elected position when he ignores the vast majority of his constituents’ will.
Sarah Fowler Arthur, state representative to the other half of Ashtabula County (because Ohio’s GOP adores gerrymandering almost as much as they adore abusing their power and harming those with less privilege), continues to do very little to benefit any of her constituents. She DID post a lovely tribute to George Washington and his apparent penchant for prayer to celebrate Presidents’ Day, so that’s what she’s spending her energy on.
I would love to write entire posts on a whole host of topics, and still have half-finished drafts about the changes to the student loan system (which are awful), more about the One Big Beautiful Bill and some of the ways it’s going to hurt all of us non-rich folks, about the ins and outs of running a private practice, odds and ends about stigma related to mental illness and addiction, more about homelessness, ruminations about the state of higher education, a discussion about Quaker history, some video game/music/movie/TV reviews, my thoughts on recipes (i.e. you should get yourself a recipe manager app that syncs across devices), and a whole lot of pictures of my dogs. See? Endless amounts of content at your fingertips, as soon as I write the dang things. That’s the trick, isn’t it?
Donald Trump continues to try his very best to cement his reputation as one of the worst Presidents our country has ever had. Which is a real feat, if you consider Andrew Jackson or Millard Fillmore or a few others in that illustrious pantheon. He’s a bully, he’s cruel, and he is a morally-bankrupt pile of garbage. At his core, he cares about very little aside from money and power. Slowly, very slowly, people are starting to realize how badly he sucks. That’s not nothing.
Vivek Ramaswamy continues to be an absolute mess of an Ohio gubernatorial candidate. How lucky for us that the GOP anointed him as their pick literally a year before the election! He’s worse than a joke--he’s a billionaire who cares about himself and his money and power (but little else). Bit of a trend developing there...
There is beauty and joy and love and kindness to be found in the world. Not only does it exist, but it exists all around you and me. We need to look a little harder for it right now than usual, but it’s there. I promise. My ask of you is that you spend some time looking for them, and when you find a glimmer, stop looking. Spend some more time just experiencing that thing that is enriching your life in that moment. The fear and doubt and hideous nature of so much that surrounds us in our lives can wait--live in the joy this week, as long as you can. You’ve earned it.
I’ll be back again soon, when I’ve got the time and space and energy. At least I’ll try my best to be back. Thanks for reading!